Julian Tuwim. The most famous aphorisms

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APHORISMS OF FAMOUS PEOPLE
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Aphorisms of famous people. Julian Tuwim

Aphorisms of famous people

Free library / Aphorisms of famous people

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Julian Tuwim. The most famous aphorisms

Blessed are those who have nothing to say and do not put this fact into words.
A tramp is a person who would be called a tourist if he had money.
Throw the lucky one into the water and he will swim up with a fish in his mouth.
Fidelity is a strong itch with a ban on scratching.
Even when you jump, don't say gop. First, look at what you jumped into.
Two glasses are enough. First the first, then a dozen of the second.
A virtuous woman does not chase her husband: has anyone seen a mousetrap running after mice?
A confessor is a person who, taking care of our afterlife, earns for himself on earth.
If you grab an elephant by the hind leg and it starts to struggle, don't resist.
A woman should be interesting only erotically, more precisely, sexually, a man will complete all the rest of her virtues for himself.
Woman: "What a pity that I did not meet you twenty kilos ago."
Life is short, let's take a sip of vodka.
Life is torment. It would have been better not to have been born at all. But this happiness falls to one of the thousands.
You need to live in such a way that you are not afraid to sell your parrot to the biggest gossip in the city.
Health is only one, but diseases are a thousand.
And the most beautiful legs end somewhere.
July is the month when windows cannot be opened on the tram that cannot be closed in January.
When something hits your eye, remember that it is a part of the Cosmos.
The conservative is a public figure who is in love with the existing disorders, the opposite of the liberal, who wants to replace these disorders with others.
A critic is like a car: the worse it is, the more noise it makes.
Whoever speaks in the name of God must first present his credentials.
Fist: hand in anger.
The face is what has grown around the nose.
Love: the only physiological process that has made a career.
Our honeymoon was such that the bees flew around in swarms."
The dream of a woman: to have a narrow foot, but to live wide.
You can say stupid things, but not in a solemn tone.
A man remains under the impression that he made on a woman for a very long time.
We have to do without a lot of things that our grandfathers did not even know existed.
If the egg were not ovoid, the life of the chicken would be ugly.
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife for free.
Do not gnaw on forbidden fruit with false teeth.
It doesn't surprise me that astronomers discovered different planets, but that they somehow learned their names.
Steam - water in a fit of inspiration.
The pessimist says that all women are harlots. The optimist does not share this opinion, but hopes.
Pessimist: An optimist with life experience.
Pivnaya: a place where every evening they come for the last time in their lives.
Progress: birds that used to sit on telegraph wires have moved to antennas.
The bird, seeing a worm on a high tree, asked: "How did you get here?" "Crawling, my dear, crawling."
Radio is a wonderful discovery. One movement of the hand - and nothing is heard.
The difference between a camel and a man: a camel can work for a week and not drink, and a man can drink for a week and not work.
The difference between courage and caution. Courage: go up to a boxer and scold him in front of everyone. Caution: do the same, but by phone.
Blood is different: the one that flows in the veins, and the one that flows from the veins. The first is the fluid circulating in the body, which means that its study is within the competence of physiologists. Whoever ascribes to this blood some other than physiological, special characteristics and mysterious properties, as we see it, as a result turns cities into ruins, destroys millions of people and, in the end, attracts a punishing sword to his own tribe.
Fate gives us relatives. It's good that we can choose our friends!
The biggest pigs usually require people to be angels.
Tell a man that there are 978301246569987 stars in the sky and he will believe. But put up a "freshly painted" sign and he'll definitely check with his finger and get dirty.
The word "happiness" does not have a plural, but "unhappiness" does.
Conscience is that quiet voice that whispers to you that someone is watching.
Such concepts as eternity and infinity, you begin to realize after you settle some business in state bodies.
Tragedy: falling in love with a face, but marrying the whole girl.
The horse has four legs. One on each corner.
Success is something that friends will never forgive you.
What happened to this world! People who had never died before began to die.
To get acquainted with the most distant relatives, it is enough to get rich.
An egoist is someone who cares more about himself than about me.

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